January 2012
“A watched coffee pot doesn’t cure a hangover.”
– Something I just came up with.
I HAVE STUFF TO DO!
The owner of the building just walked in like he owns the place (technicality!) and I was totally on a roll today! I dropped off my ID at the optometrist after two weeks of dodging phone calls, called Fido to make sure I was allowed to have free internet again, and ordered a renewal form for my expired medicare card and NOW I have to call some government guy who probably leaves work at 4:30pm and...
I just listened to the world's most boring persona...
It’s her friend’s boyfriend’s birthday.
She left her last job on good terms.
She finished the project last week.
SALLY or DAN will write a good letter for him.
Wait, what? Ask a lawyer? Marty’s a good kid with a great family? Poor guys is going to have to deal with the stigma?
Suddenly this conversation is fascinating. Goddamnit I wish I’d made friends with her...
“Slut” is how we vilify a woman for exercising her right to say “yes”....”
– via angels-and-angles:livelaughawesome
I just scoffed at some apples.
Getting ready to create a superblog. Who’s following me?
I want to start a Christian form of Rickrolling...
corycavin:
It works like this:
1. Ask someone a question - “Hey do you remember when you did that thing…?”
2. When they answer yes, you simply reply “IT WAS THEN THAT I CARRIED YOU”.
Try it out on your friends.
I refuse to believe that I drank that entire...
So there's this couple sharing a room...
They are the only couple in the building that shares a room. It’s basically student housing post-res, so everyone is in a tiny bedroom in apartments of four or five people. So we have these exchange students who I guess insisted on being together in a room, making a five-person apartment a six person apartment, and even though I’m the kind of crazy girlfriend who would insist on that,...
adamalone asked: That shot - you in a studio in Montreal in November 2010, double exposed with a street in Soho (maybe Tribeca? I can't remember) shot in November 2011.
“I don’t know why you think saying “I don’t use markers”...”
– Me, to the hottest black dude ever. The only thing that would have made that exchange more poignant was if I was Candice.
“The mystical healing properties of tears are invoked in fairy tales and...”
– How Tears Go ‘Pac-Man’ To Beat Bacteria (via npr)
Ha! Take that, former bosses who claim I shouldn’t be so emotional. My eyes are just looking out for the rest if me!
THE CAT MARNELL SCHOOL OF DATING: "IF YOU DON'T... →
aileengetsbeatendown:
I’m considering taking up this dating philosophy, if only because I’m single and therefore all past philosophies have failed. Thoughts?
1) NO. Honestly this kinda shit only works on guys who are already completely in love with you. Trust me. I’ve dated 99% of the guys in Montreal and the only person who ever put up with my shit is French BF. And that’s...
My fake white whine
Today, as I was transferring metros, I started to feel very sad about going to work. When I get off at my station, I have to walk down a long corridor to get out at the nearest exit to my job, and there are anywhere from four to eight grizzled, slouching, unhappy-looking men with cardboard signs and empty coffee cups patiently waiting to be noticed, fed, or tossed a quarter. It’s so...
I just spent a whole minute loking for whiskey in...
Crisis averted - found some in a flask on the coffee table. FYI don’t plan to make s’mores without ensuring you have whiskey in the house because they go together like spaghetti and tunafish.
Also, if you’re French Canadian and no one let you have s’mores when you were little because you can’t say anything equally adorable in French, well, read the fucking...
Honorary Sister
Some of the chicks on the 9th floor are having a thing and all of these Phi Kappa Pi’s keep coming in and since I made the mistake of mentioning to the first one that I dated a few Phi Kap’s, all subsequent visitor’s have been coming up to me and shaking my hand.
Finally, one of their non-member friends told me he didn’t think it was something to be proud of, and I almost...
The Costco Analogy →
pullmyfoamfinger:
livejamie:
Confused about SOPA/PIPA and need it explained in Costco terminology? We got you covered.
I wish every political issue was explained this way.
I wasn’t so much confused about SOPA/PIPA as I hadn’t read anything about it because I’m Canadian and we don’t have the right to vote in America (yet! Maybe that’s why some American’s...
Listening to people exaggerate when they are...
"The Washington Post is joining several other... →
ALL the whipped cream
I can already tell this is gonna be a weird day.
I have to go into work 4 hours early today (but I don’t finish early) and this morning I woke up after a restless sleep to find that while I was nursing French BF back to health, my roommates bought a new tube of toothpaste. Let me save you the taste test, which felt a lot like scrubbing my mouth with orange-bubble-gum-flavoured fluoride: it...
Hey there, Girl on metro with PERFECT SKIN wearing such a thick layer of foundation that your ginger eyebrows are pretty much obliterated, can I PLEASE take you to Sephora? We can do better than this. Well, I can do a better makeup job than this, and you can do better than the guy who’s making our ears bleed because he’s so fucking boring.
Maybe we can attract a guy who talks about...